When Did I Get Memorial Day Off?

While I do get Memorial Day off (not paid, mind you) I don't believe I have anything in the way of plans. No one has actually invited me to do anything, and I can't blame them. I think I have a pool of 4 people I talk to in Chicago, and that number slowly whittles down. So it's another lonely day off for me. But, there is hope!

By hope I meant I'm going to sleep the whole day. What? You thought that was going to end some other way? Have you read my blog before? Anyway, the week has been difficult and slow so I can't imagine spending my day off doing anything else but recharging. I might watch some movies or shows, but that's about it.

In other news, I just scheduled a showing at my job on my day off! Yup, so bored, I'd rather work Monday, not like I'm getting paid for it...

When Did I Start Going Through The Motions?

So here we are, the first day without James here at home, and I'm trying to be a good sport. I woke up at a decent time. I helped mom marinate lunch. I put away the clean dishes. I fed the dog. Everything seems normal, but there is that ebbing feeling under my skin because I know something is missing.

I did manage to sleep (pass out) last night without an issue, which was better than expected. Even with the sleep though, I feel tired and could probably curl up under the covers for a few more hours. But then my parents would worry like they tend to. "Are you feeling ok, mija?" "You can talk to me about anything, mijah." "This is just a step towards your future, mija." While I appreciate their concern and need to comfort me, it's not what I want or need. I just want to forget the fact I'm alone even for a little, which I can do when I sleep.

I've volunteered to work on my day off tomorrow, and instead take Wednesday off. There is a lot of work to do in the office, so I'd rather work 2 days this week, have a break, then work 2 and a half days. Though, I'm so used to a 2 day consecutive break, I know tomorrow will feel off. 

Today is Cinco de Mayo, and not too sure what that entails. I'm half Mexican, and I'm pretty sure it has something to do with tacos and Corona. Sadly I'm not 21, and also my small pool of friends are either in another state or busy tonight. So looks like this Cinco de Mayo will go uncelebrated,  not that it's a huge loss here.

When Did I Ever Have Such A Great Nights Sleep?

I appreciate good sleep just as much as I loath bad sleep, and last night was GREAT!

My personal sleeping pill.

AND IT'S ALL THANKS TO JAMES BEING BACK IN CHICAGO! Yes, James arrived last night pretty late, but I felt so amazingly peaceful once we were together again that I had the best nights sleep ever.

So his schedule for today is/was:

• James goes to the recruiter office to talk to the Officer.
• James has his appointment for tomorrow at MEPS confirmed.
• Tonight James will stay at a hotel.
• Tomorrow morning, James will go and get his MEPS stuff finished.
• Hopefully from that, we get offered the contract right away Thursday.

I'm in my optimistic zone right now, and I know James is all good to get passed.

Look how good I look after sleep!

So tonight I have to go and buy NEW pants for my costume because the ones I got are too big on me and look funny with the corset over them. I'm already going out with my mom to her physical therapy after work, so it's on the way. Busy days leading up to C2E2, but I'm expecting good news all around! Wish my husband luck!

When Did I Stop Sleeping?

That's a bit of a loaded question, considering the start of this blog was done in a fit of insomnia. Can I tell you something personal? I love sleeping. There was a time not too long ago all I did in my free time was sleep. Hours and hours and hours of sleep. I let more than half the day go by. You know what? I enjoyed it more than being awake. I could create more interesting, interactive, and meaningful scenarios in my dreams that I could hope to achieve in my waking life.

Then, something happened. I met a boy who gave me a reason to stay awake. I'm now married to this man. Then an obstacle came up. I wanted to sleep, but I couldn't anymore. I had violent nightmares, flashing disturbing images, and haunting voices. I divulged my concerns to my doctor, and she gave me pills. I then had no trouble going to sleep, and I did it at a pretty acceptable time.

I find I still sleep way more than I should. I take "cat naps". I nap during the day. Then, when nighttime comes, I stay awake hours, if not the whole night. I read news from the day, I watch movies, I read, or I find another 100 ways to occupy those late night hours. Well, other than watching my husband sleep.

I'm either sleeping too much, or awake too much. Polarized is not what I'd call healthy, but it is my normal. Do you have a normal sleep schedule? Do you cling while sleep attempts to drag you away? I never cling. I'm a willing abductie.